I'm starting to feel like this month is just a revisitation of my days with LiveJournal. Complain all day about my tough life with a job and a home and friends I adore because things aren't exactly they way I'd like them to be. It's good to be un-satisfied with some things. I think it gives you motivation to try and improve your situation, but bitching about it can only go so far.
The day before Thanksgiving, my roommates and I had a pre-Thanksgiving party at our apartment with our friends. We cooked a bunch of delicious food and they brought some of their own. Everyone ate and drank and talked and once the turkey was finally ready and we were all sitting down to each in the living room, one of my roommates decided we were all going to say what we were thankful for this year. I groaned on the inside and listened as people expressed some genuine, touching thoughts. When my turn came I decided this wasn't a completely empty exercise, and told everyone how glad I am to have what I do even though life isn't what I wish it was right now. It felt great, and I left it completely behind.
I realize I'm imbuing this vacation coming up next week with a lot of power, but I think I'll be able to recover a little of the self-worth I've lost over the past year. How much can you really do in a week's time? I don't really know, but here's hoping.
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